Fourth of July Faux Pas

The Austin brother-in-law was all set to bring Rudy's barbecue for our Fourth of July family celebration. The economic outlook being what it is, I suggested that I should smoke a brisket on my gas grill to save a boatload of cash while feeding the dozen folks expected for our celebration. Now, I have smoked brisket on my grill precisely one other time, with lessons learned. Still, the family was amenable and so at 6 a.m. sharp, I put a dry rub seasoned brisket on the grill to smoke using mesquite wood chips.

   Mesquite chips smoking

In my research and limited experience, six hours ought to be long enough to smoke a brisket. The last time I tried it, six hours was not enough, so I decided this time to turn up the burner a bit. Cooking brisket on a gas grill requires the "indirect" method of cooking. One of the four grill burners was turned on. The remaining three were off. The brisket cooks over the off burners by indirect heat. The wood chips are placed over the one "on" burner.

         
          Brisket after three hours

All morning I enjoyed the wonderful smell of mesquite smoke. I fantasized about the amazing brisket we were all going to enjoy for the family meal. And, everything seemed to be going according to plan. At high noon, I removed a beautiful, aromatic smoked brisket from the fire and swaddled it in aluminum foil for an obligatory 45-minute resting and tenderizing period. Then, full of joy and self satisfaction, I arrived at the in-laws house just as everyone's appetite was honed to a sharp edge.

       
         "Done" brisket after six hours

One immediate matter of concern presented itself. We had company. A stranger was in the house. I won't say more about who it was, but will just say that I was concerned. If my brisket didn't turn out good I could live with the family eating substandard beef. I don't like strangers tasting a less than perfect production.

With trepidation, I cut into the brisket to discover....it was extremely rare in the middle. Yep. The turning up of the burner had failed to produce enough additional heat to finish the brisket in six hours. What was left to do? Everyone was hungry! So, with a shrinking spirit I cut up this bloody beast, which would have been a real hit on the Food Network but was a massive issue with my mostly "well done or else" in-laws. And then...horror of horrors...I popped it in the nuclear reactor for a few minutes to erase all appearance of red from the brisket: Simultaneously removing any hope for a fork tender dining experience.

           
          My daily plate with fixins'

The extra guest was gracious. The family not so much. Me...I just pretended to enjoy every bite as if it was the finest Rudy's production ever. But I didn't even raise an eyebrow when single brother-in-law, who, by the way, brought the extra guest, took a helping of brisket to feed to his two dogs. "Here," I volunteered. "Feed them some more of this leftover brisket."

I chalk this up to one more lesson learned. I've been given one more attempt at producing a succulent brisket via gas grill. And then -- three strikes and you're out!